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Topic: Dad jokes.

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Jedi Master
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Dad jokes.
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Why couldn't the green pepper practice archery?

He didn't habanero

Alumni
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In this digital era, I fear for the traditional paper wall calendar. I think it’s days are numbered.

Alumni
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My dad works for a company that makes bicycle wheels.... He's the spokesman.

Alumni
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I bought some velcro shoes, they were a rip off


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If you boil a funny bone, it becomes a laughingstock

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My wife asked me to pick up six cans of Sprite I picked 7 up.

Jedi Master
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What do you call a gorilla with a banana in each ear?

Anything you want, he can't hear you

Alumni
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when does a joke become a dad joke....
trust me, it's apparent.

Jedi Master
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Did you know that in Oslo, they put barcodes on the aircraft carriers?

It's so that when they dock, they can Scandinavian.

Jedi Master
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Why did the fisherman put peanut butter on his hook?

He was trying to catch a jellyfish!

Alumni
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At the zoo I saw a piece of toast in a cage. The sign on the cage said: BREAD IN CAPTIVITY.



Alumni
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What do weightlifters in the arctic and Antarctica take?

 

polar roids. 



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what disease do tics in Florida give you?

key lime disease. 



Alumni
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A cheese factory exploded in France. Da brie is everywhere!

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How do you get a country girl's attention? A tractor.



Alumni
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how do fish get high?

seaweed.

Alumni
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Why don’t crabs give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.



Jedi Master
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May be an image of text that says 'Just found'out the company that produces yardsticks won't be making them any longer.'



Jedi Master
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What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.

Alumni
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If you see a robbery at an Apple Store does that make you an iWitness?



 
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